Man Against Himself

Why are men in their last 2-3 decades not wanting to live anymore? Why are women’s rate of suicide so much lower? 

Why is nobody talking about this?

Let’s start by looking at how us men are deeply programmed to see the world, and ourselves in it.

In “Connect to our Roots,” I talk about how for millions of years, men were hunters, warriors, and builders. They contributed by keeping their clan alive. 

Those abilities gave them a high sense of value. Today building, hunting, and protecting can be accomplished by securing a home, watching over our family, and making money. 

No killing required. 

But after retirement, with the kids gone, a body that's feeble from disuse, and the absence of making income, how can we still feel like - a man? 

This is why women’s rate of suicide is so much less. 

For thousands of years, a huge component to women's survival was creating community. This is something they can be part of their entire lives. 

I see this sense of community building all throughout nursing homes. Women talk to each other, compliment each other, save and sneak food for each other, cheer each other on, and know each others’ birthdays. They’re still creating community and giving themselves a solid sense of self worth.

Older men? 

I’ve been in countless nursing homes, assisted living apartments, and residential care suites. When men have roommates, and I rarely see them talk to each other. 

No community there. 

Can’t blame us, it’s not in our instincts. If men aren't coordinating around a common goal, there's little need to communicate. We're comfortable with that, but we suffer for it. 

So how do we stop older men from feeling life isn’t worth living? 

First and foremost, we need to stress and strain their bodies again. Strength training, at whatever capacity, sends deep signals throughout our bodies and brains that we're back in the game.

Strength training gives us that primal sense that we’re struggling and striving to survive, and our body's love it. 

Have men strength train together, and now they’ll have something to talk about. They’ll bond like a pack of hunters getting food for their village. 

Tons of studies show that men who have meaningful relationships recover faster and live longer. 

But few men just talk. We need to talk about something. This is where having a meaningful purpose saves the day. By sharing a common goal with levels of accomplishment, we can strategize, help each other, and share accomplishments. Most of successful men’s groups are organized like packs. That’s no coincidence.

Their new strength and energy will propel them to find new challenges, set new goals, and have new accomplishments.

These men will feel alive again, have a new look in their eye, and instinctively feel a deeper sense of purpose. 

This is their beginning of feeling 2nd 50 Strong. 

But what’s even more effective, is never letting it come to this in the first place. Having men march into their 70s and 80s with strength, confidence and pride is our real goal.

Let’s shock the world with a new breed of 2nd 50 men.

Grow or Die,

Ken Kowalsky